The Lemon Detox Diehard

A little something I put together in the awful period of my life when I thought the Lemon Detox Diet was for winners!

The thought of food makes my mouth water. Literally. I haven’t eaten in five days and the stupid part about this is that it’s by choice completely. I’ve put myself in this situation and now I am stuck here by the power of will.

I wanted to rid my body of this excess fat that cuddles my hips so attentively and I wanted to relieve my temple of the toxins that should never have got past the guards.

This is not an easy procedure. Desire for food is always present and the only way to hinder it even slightly, it is to rebuke my innocent taste buds with the vulgar, uncomfortable taste of a concoction put together by some nutty natural health enthusiasts.

But even then, when I torment my body with the ‘vital’ lemon and syrup combination, the hunger has only really had its edge taken off and that edge re-generates very quickly, like the healing process of a wolf in Stephanie Meyers Twilight saga. The edge is re-built and my stomach is immediately alerted, sending an instant plead to my brain “Feed me bitch!”

I then have to calm my sorry brain down, convince it that food is for peasants, convince it that we are above food, convince it that we only want liquid!

I make my way to the fridge which can never be too far away, to find the sickening replenishment to demolish, the sickening replenishment that they call the Lemon Detox Diet.