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Thursday, February 2, 2012

My composting brings all the birds to the yard


I'm here to teach you a little something about composting, because I have never met a location I can't compost in and I'm sure if you really tried, you wouldn't meet such a location either.

Composting is so incredibly basic that I'm surprised it's not more enforced. The rules are simple; if you have a bit of garden/bush/grass space, you can compost.

My first apartment was more of a hassle to compost from than other spaces I've lived in as it required me to actually leave the house and go downstairs. I had to sneak into the bushes while the neighbours weren't looking and deposit my little bucket of scraps into the garden and cover it with leaves. Every time I did it I would feel like a naughty little composting fairy, offering my smelly gifts to mother nature.

My second apartment = complete composting breeze. Although I would have to step over my bed with the scraps to get to the window, this was but a small obstacle to gain access to the mini forest of trees below. You name it - chicken scraps, orange peels, egg shells, whatever it was, if it wasn't going in my mouth it was going out the bedroom window and back to nature.

In my current dwelling, it is probably the most convenient composting process yet. If it isn't straight out the kitchen window (which I must admit, I do have trouble aiming from) it is straight off the kitchen balcony and into the little garden space which no one can access. Luckily because it's pretty much inaccessible without a climb, no one will ever know about my great organic deeds, which I dare say some may disapprove of. For instance, I was a little bit naughty around Christmas when I chucked all the stinky prawn heads/shells and squid guts over there. It was fine at the time but the next day it kind of made the whole outside area stink. BUT, as a considerate and good composting sort, I climbed into that composting haven and buried those naughty, stinky seafood scraps with dirt, allowing nature to absorb the scrappy juices through the soil. Problem solved.

Sometimes, when the scraps are too light, liquified or sloppy to be thrown from the kitchen level, the lucky things get to go on a field trip upstairs to my bedroom balcony where they get to base jump into the garden from even higher.

So you see, composting is easy and wonderful and anyone who cares enough about reducing their carbon print on this already environmentally unfriendly world, can join in on the fun! Although I'm guessing that's not you, but thanks for reading none the less.

But you know, not only does the food get to naturally break down and biodegrade its arse back into nature, but often I get little thank yous from birds and cats for giving them little snacks to enjoy.

OK OK, so what I do isn't actually "composting" per se, because composting is more about using decayed organic material as a plant fertilizer (which I'm sure it's doing anyway) but what I am doing is healthy for the environment and I'm heaps more popular with it now.

Hippies UNITE!

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

I'm learning about the universe, what are you doing?


I'm learning about the universe. I know it sounds crazy, right. You are probably thinking "what is a narcissistic 24 year old girl who writes about falling off stools doing learning about something so big and scientifically wonderful. Not only that, but how will she be able to comprehend such a complex subject?"
These are both very good questions, both I have already asked myself. The answer is simple - I shall read my complex book about the universe (which claims to be simple) very, very slowly.
The universe is just great. I've always been interested in the topic because my dad LOVES it. He is great at explaining amazing things about it in simple terms because understands it and is fascinated by the subject. His brain is also more developed than mine (I think), he is smarter, wiser and reads a lot of books. In my defense however, although I may not read books and understand incomprehensible subjects, I do know how to turn on and operate a computer reasonably well (poor Dad).
Anyway, on Christmas night, after a giant pork roast and beer full of belly, or a belly full of beer (I don't want to delete what I typed first because it was a mistake and a funny one at that) we sat around pondering the universe and all things great. From how vastly big the universe actually is, to the speed of light and all things in between.
A few days later when I was back at work and the silly season had died down (a little), I sat at my desk thinking about my life time dream of having a smart brain which I would use to be really, really, ridiculously successful. It was at that moment that I realised that I really needed to learn about the universe.
I text my dad right away and asked him what book he recommended I read to learn about the universe in a really simple way. He recommended "A Short History of Nearly Everything" by Bill Bryson.
HOW EXCITED AM I NOW?
I've got the book at home and I've read two chapters in two days. I plan to read every chapter very slowly and read it very slowly twice. Then, once I have a good enough understanding of each chapter, I will extract my favourite pieces of information and re-write them in a version that all narcissistic 24 year old girls who write about falling off stools will understand.